Breathe Again
by Lily Anna Evans Potter
Summary: 3.11 missing moment: During Brianna's lung transplant, Drew feels guilty for not being there for her. Syd's experience as a mother does little to make him feel better, but when Rick arrives he dares to hope for the best once more. Together Drew and Rick wait for Brianna to wake up and when she finally says she can breathe again, so can they.


**Breathe Again**

Drew was keenly aware of his aching fingers as he stood behind the observation window of the operation theatre where Brianna was currently getting her new lungs. He knew that impressive bruises were blooming across his knuckles, but somehow he couldn't stop the rhythmic action of clenching and unclenching his fists. He didn't even turn when the door behind him creaked open and flinched when Syd shoved a paper coffee cup into his hand. "How are you holding up?"

"Honestly?" said Drew, not surprised when the brunette nodded seriously. "It's bizarre, the kid is the one getting a lung transplant, and I'm the one who can't breathe right now."

"Welcome to parenthood, buddy," she smiled sympathetically. "Brianna's going to be fine, you know. She's a very fortunate little girl to have you in her corner."

"No, she's lucky these lungs were a match when they were," Drew corrected her. "It's only been a few weeks, but I was so scared of losing her. And now I might have wrecked our chances of adopting her. God, I could kill T.C right now!"

"Murder definitely wouldn't help your case, pal," Syd pointed out. "I heard rumors that the social worker was pissed when she was told you were in jail. What actually happened last night?"

"T got into a bar fight," Drew told her with a scowl. "He was binge-drinking after breaking up with his new girlfriend, and some guy provoked him. I tried to break it up, so we both got locked up. Jessica even ended up bailing us out ironically, probably trying to buy his forgiveness or something. This is why I don't date women. Just knowing that I couldn't be here when I'd promised Brianna I would be…it felt horrible. Everybody in that girl's life has let her down."

"Except you," Syd told him, and he eyed her skeptically. "I'm serious. Look, if you beat yourself up this hard every time you make a mistake as a parent, you'll never be happy again. Trust me; I've been on the job for thirteen years."

"Riley loves you, silly," Drew pointed out, his tone still disbelieving of her attempted wisdom. "I know things got strained with your ex-husband, but nothing he ever says about you has changed that. She's a great kid."

"I know she is," Syd agreed fondly. "And for those three months you never let her feel like her mother didn't care while I was stuck on duty in Afghanistan, I know she believes in you as much as I do. Maybe when Brianna gets better, we can have a playdate sometime."

At the future hinted in her words, Drew's gaze snapped back to the operating theatre. "You really think she's gonna be okay?"

"Of course," said Syd gently, but before she could be any more reassuring, the door behind them announced another arrival.

"I am so sorry I'm late," gasped the most calming voice Drew had ever known. "It's impossible to get away from the base sometimes, recruits these days are hopeless." Rick stopped rambling when his husband turned around with overwhelming relief in his pale green eyes. "Jesus honey, what happened to your face?"

"That's a long story, it can wait," Drew mumbled and fell into the dark-haired man's waiting arms. "I'm so glad you made it, curse those damn recruits."

"Of course I made it," said Rick softly, trailing circles on Drew's back with a soothing hand. "How's our girl doing?"

"It sounds so amazing to hear you say that," sighed Drew, straightening up reluctantly when he felt Rick leaning back against the door. "Sorry, that was intense. You should have said something."

"A prosthetic leg does not affect my ability to give first-rate hugs, babe. It's fine," Rick told him airily. "Who's your friend by the way?"

"Major Syd Jennings," said the brunette, extending her hand politely. "It's nice to finally meet you, Captain."

"Likewise," said Rick, throwing her a lopsided smile. "Just Rick is fine, you know. I'm not really the top dog anymore."

"Sure you are," Drew chipped in. "Forget Captain, if all goes well we're both going to be parents soon. God, I really hope I didn't screw that up for us. I'm seriously going to kill T.C if his sorry ass bar fight ruined our chances!"

"I guess that explains the face?" Rick sighed and moved towards the bench against the wall when Drew nodded reluctantly. "T.C and bar fights isn't exactly a new thing, is it? Why did you have to get involved?"

"I guess I felt sorry for him," said Drew, leaning against his husband's shoulder wearily. "Turns out the girl he's been seeing was using him, she works for the company trying to take over this entire hospital. I've never seen Topher so stressed; it's some complicated bureaucracy issue."

"That's a mess, for sure." Rick pressed a kiss to his forehead and Drew felt his fears subsiding at the simple action. "So we may have to fight for the kid a little, from what you've said she's well worth it. We are going to be parents, babe."

"I love you, you know that?" said Drew softly. "Brianna's an amazing girl; I just hope this works out for us, that's all. First, the surgery has to go well; you know how touch-and-go transplants can be."

"She's going to be okay, Drew," Rick told him reassuringly. "And then we will be the family she deserves, just you wait and see. I love you too, by the way."

"Wait and see are the keywords right now." Drew slipped his hand into Rick's and squeezed hard, pressing all his fear and desperate desire for this dream to come true into the touch. Together, even the hell of this wait was going to be bearable.

 _A few hours later_

By the time Brianna's anesthesia was about to wear off, Drew's guilt trip had subsided too. He had broken his promise to be here when she went into surgery, but when the thirteen-year-old woke up, the first thing she would see would be the faces of two people to whom she was a dream come true. Rick sat beside him, squeezing his shoulder with a hand that trembled in anticipation. It was as if he knew just what Drew was thinking, that's why he loved him so much.

It felt like an eternity before the teenager's eyelids fluttered, like a little princess emerging from a dream. "Drew?" she said hoarsely.

"Hi Bri," he whispered, stroking the back of her hand gently. "How are you feeling?"

The blonde seemed to consider the question for a moment, and suddenly her blue eyes opened wider in realization. "I can breathe," she said in awe. "Drew, I can breathe properly!"

"Yeah," he nodded and pulled away from Rick's comforting grip to lean forward and kiss her forehead. "So can I, kiddo."

"Are you crying?" she said in disbelief, swiping gently at his cheeks. "Dude, this is an awesome moment here. So much better than any trip to Narnia."

"I'm so sorry I missed being here when they put you under, Bri. You must have been so scared all alone. I promise I'll never let you down again. I'll always be there for you from now on, I swear!"

"I was scared," she admitted. "But I wasn't alone here. I knew you'd come as soon as you could. And Paul is a bad liar," she giggled. "When he said that you were on the way, I knew I could go to sleep, and it was going to be okay."

"How did you know all that?" he marveled.

"Because you're different," she told him, smiling at Rick's grin of agreement over Drew's shoulder. "My whole life, besides Nina and my foster Mom who died nobody has ever been there for me as much as you have. I can't wait to be a family officially…Dad."

"Thank God you're okay," Drew choked, drawing her into a careful hug. "Screw the paperwork, you own our hearts already, kid."

"We love you," Rick echoed the sentiment, hobbling around the bed to sit on her other side. Trapped in a sandwich of the most genuine affection she had ever known, Brianna felt a rush of gratitude for something even bigger than her newly functional lungs: a loving family. When pure hearts were involved, no legalities could take away that bond, and she knew she would never be alone again.

 **A / N The scene after Brianna's surgery success had me bawling so I had to write something, enjoy! xx**


End file.
